Monday, November 16, 2009

Media's Use of Cuddly Creatures

Al Gore is a sharp man. His film, An Inconvenient Truth, wouldn’t have achieved as much popular acclaim were it not for the use of the polar bear to garner our sympathy. It's probably his smartest move ever, with inventing the internet being a close second. Even I felt my heart go out for the poor creature as it swam in the vast ocean with no ice chunk for it to lay its weary head upon. It didn’t make me rush out and install solar panels on my roof, but my heartstrings were tugged.

How did those large white bears manage to grab our affection? I’m pretty sure if I was wandering around some arctic environment and came across a Momma polar bear, she would not share a Coke with me. In fact she would probably share me with her cubs. And yet, every time I watch those silly soda commercials, I want to run out and talk to an illegal animal trader about securing a polar bear cub for my very own. And I would name it Snowball or Snowflake or Snowshoe and we would sip caffeinated beverages together and sled down gently sloped hills.

The next time you feel yourself being manipulated by media featuring those furry creatures, remember the following:

1. If given the chance, they will rip you to shreds and eat you for dinner

2. In reality, their fur isn’t usually sparkly clean and white, but pretty grungy looking

3. They don’t drink Coke. They will drink your blood

Just repeat the above three points to yourself, and hopefully your sanity will return.


Sarah (your cousin) said...

Precisely why I will never become a vegetarian. I eat you, you eat me... circle of life...mmm...cheeseburger

Susan said...

I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.

- Anonymous