Thursday, March 27, 2008

Lightbulb

This was sent to me by a co-worker. Would you say they are generally on the ball about typical stereotypes of various denominations? The Unitarian one made me laugh the most.

CHANGING A LIGHT BULB THE CHRISTIAN WAY

Charismatic : Only 1
Hands are already in the air.

Pentecostal : 10
One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of
darkness.

Presbyterians : None
Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic: None - Candles only.

Baptists : At least 15.
One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the
change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalians: 3
One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk
about how much better the old one was.

Mormons : 5
One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians :
We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists : Undetermined
Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved.
You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of
your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.

Nazarene : 6
One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

Lutherans : None
Lutherans don’t believe in change.

Amish :
What’s a light bulb?
-----------------
And now to something much more worthwhile and interesting. Have you ever noticed some verses in the Bible say LORD and others Lord? I didn’t until recently. RC Sproul gives insight.

LORD - the name of God, indicates the word Jahweh is used in the OT

Lord - God’s title, it means adonai - sovereign one

It sheds new light on many verses I thought I had grasped. It excites me.

1 comment:

Helen said...

hahahaha, the Pentecostal one totally got me!